A long lost past
by Spartansneverdie312
Summary: lost in another dimension due to a teleportation grenade, Wash, Caboose Carolina, Donut, Lopez, Doc, Tucker and their two new friends explore the world of Remnant. They become younger and make new friends, and save their third planet. You know, the same old shit with the same old idiots. (ON HOLD)
1. Chapter 1

_**This is after the events of defeating the other red and blues. The gang has been reunited with wash.**_

 _ **[Inspiration: Monster- Imagine Dragons. Disclaimer]**_

 _ **[I DO NOT OWN RWBY OR RVB or the song. Disclaimer]**_

 _ **This is my first attempt to write fan-friction. Best of luck to me.**_

 _Jaune was running. They knew. Knew that he was a fraud. That he had cheated, faked his transcripts as in hopes to join beacon and become a hunter, his lifelong dream. Cardin, that bastard had heard him tell this to Pyrrha, and kept him on a leash. . After Jaune saved him from the Giant Ursa and warned him to stay away from his friends and team, that fuck-tard ratted him out. The looks on their faces, Pyrrha, Ruby, his team._

 _Ruby closed down towards him, but tried to talk to him sometimes. Pyrrha and his team mates ignored him and Yang threatened to Murder him if he even came near her sister. 'Bad influence' she called him. And ice queen? More 'look who is boss' attitude, she was more of a bitch than before. Blake, she was WAY more distant now. Cardin used this opportunity to bully Jaune even more._

 _At sparing matches they freaking tried to kill him. The teachers were nice to him and always cared about him, the only reason he was still alive._

 _He left his sword and shield behind. He wasn't worth those generations old family heirlooms. The teachers tried their best but with everyone against him, including six out of his seven sisters and his father, he decided to run. But not without a note._

* * *

 _Dear 'friends'_

 _You know what I am now, a liar, and a cheat. And you have showed me I have no place with you all. That I am a 'nobody.' Nothing. Pyrrha,_ _I told you my secret, showed you how I was and you turned your back on me. Nora, you kept threatening to break my legs. And Ren? That fucker just acted like I didn't even exist. I just wanted to fit in for god's sake! Was that something to much to ask? What happened to friends stick together? Team mates have each other's backs? You all didn't even let me enter._ _I have no friends, and no family now, apparently. Cardin? I saved that fuck-tard's life and look how he repaid me? The Ursa i fought to save him._

 _Ruby, you are the only one I can-can still call a friend, the only one who still wanted to talk to me, just to scared. Wow, I am fucking crying now. It sucks, being betrayed, left behind by my own team. But it makes sense, I can't blame you all, this was all my fault. I did do some serious shit. Well this is good bye. Send the Crocea Mors to the person who I used to call my father._

 _Goodbye. You all will never have to see me again. This is what you all had wished for, right?_

* * *

Wash awoke suddenly, grasping for precious air. _Just a nightmare_ , he thought _a leftover of a long lost past._

He went on a little walk around the ship, when an alarm went off. _Déjà vu_. He ran towards the cockpit of the UNSC Freedom 11, and met the reds and the blues already assembled there.

"What is wrong, 'this time?'", Wash asked Carolina?

"Do you really wanna know?"

Wash shakes his head.

"Captain Jo-ans, what should we do?"

"Only one thing to do. Also the name is Jones." the captain said as he turns on the speaker "abandon ship, this is not a drill. The Freedom 11 is breaking appart. Please proceed to the escape pod"

* * *

 **A memory of the past, Remnant**

 _Pyrrha was the first one to notice Jaune was missing. He was neither at any of the classes and his sword and shield in front of the door to their room. He had not entered for weeks now, since the incident. She knew she should have forgiven Jaune by now, he told her a deep secret, the biggest one he had. But she felt betrayed._

 _She went towards the roof. Many times he went there, silently looking from the ledge. Pyrrha just went to make sure he didn't do anything harsh, unseen by him._

" _AAAHHHHHHH…" she heard Nora suddenly scream and ran in to find Ren frozen, staring at a letter that evidently had been covered by the Crocea Mors. She took it from the shell-shocked Ren and started reading it._

 _The building shook from the power of Pyrrha's semblance, the metal support inside it bending from the force._

' _Noooooo…" she whispered as she fell to her knees "Jaune"_

 _And with that she fell unconscious._

* * *

 **Near the escape pod**

"Ok, so all of us can fit, so our friends from chorus will go in the first one along with sister-"

"Ok cop, why should we listen to u; 'Cop'"

"First of all, I am not a cop, and second do you really wana experience 'Shotgun's lap again?'"

"No. NO. NEVER", shouted everyone.

"YES", screeched donut.

" **Shut up you fool!** " shouted O'Malley.

"Ok, not cop" said sister, and then whispered "Cop"

Wash turns to Grif "is she always like this?"

"Oh, you will not believe the half of it."

"I can confirm that" said Simons, "That bitch is plain crazy"

At last they were divide into the following groups:

 _ **Team 1**_

Jensen

Palamo

Andersmith

Bitters

Sister

The pilot, James

Sargent. Millers (a random soldier)

Private. John (a random soldier)

 _ **Team 2**_

Grif

Simon

Sarg

Lt. Rook (another a random soldier)

Capt. Rogers (and another)

Dylan

Jax

Private. Rock (wow there are a lot of random soldiers here)

The pilot, Blade

 _ **Team 3**_

Caboose

Doc

Washington

Donut

Tucker

Lopez

Private O'Malley (Random ODST, CO and squad were MIA)

The pilot, Ranger

Carolina

"Ok now that we all know which ship we will use, SO WHY DON'T WE FUCKING GO?"

"Yeah, roller-coaster ride" said someone who any rvb fan will recognize.

"Don't tell the cop anything" said sister

" **Muhahaha…** " laughed O'Malley as the escape pods ejected.

* * *

 **A memory of the past, Remnant**

 _Ruby was on a mission. Along with her team. They roamed around day and night, in hope to find Jaune._

 _Qrow was in charge of the search, which he was happy with as he got time to spend time with his nieces. His semblance did not cause any trouble either, somehow._

 _That is when his eyes say something red and white, creating a lightish-red shade. it was shaped like blood stained armor, torn in half. He stepped closer and recognized whose it was. "GIRLS!" he shouted._

* * *

 **Remnant, present, Ozpin's office**

He had failed. It had been 6 months since Jaune disappearance.

One of his biggest failures. He had known that Jaune had cheated his way in, but he had seen potential in Jaune too.

He had thought that Pyrrha would help him reach his best. He sometimes watched them from this office.

Glynda walked in.

"We have set up the posters as you said" she said.

"Good. And the children? How are they?"

"They haven't lost hope. Not yet. But Pyrrha. She has changed a lot."

"I know, she thinks that this is all her fault." Ozpin sighted.

"And Ozpin, Jaune's sisters have applied to change their school to beacon"

"Their names?"

"Sienna and Garnet, twins, the youngest of the four, Hazel the middle one, and Azure the eldest"

"What do you think?"

"Let's give them the room in front of team CRDL."

"You have my permission." he said, chuckling. all of Jaune's sisters were in fourth year, and top of the class


	2. Chapter 2 The arrival

**Well, I have got a lot of nice views on the story so far, but (I am sorry for this) it turns out my story's first chapter is very similar to another story,** _{{{{Freelancer Arc_ _}}}}_ **. Sorry for this. I was not aware of this, and was bought to me by** _"BraveSeeker3_ _"_ **and I would like to thank him for it. I would like to say sorry to the writer of Freelancer Arc,** _"York Lane"_ **and reassure my actual plot is rather different.** _No spoilers. ;)_ **Also remember the teams, the ones on the escape pods. There was a reason I wrote all of them down, and as standard UNSC escape pods, they have 8 seats + the pilot's seat**

 _ **\\\\\If I by chance have a same idea that already exists,**_ plz warn me _ **/.**_

{{{ _I don't own RWBY OR RVB_ }}}

 **I am not using an inspiration in this chapter.**

 **Private O'Malley will now be called Captain Miller, the CO of the missing squad**

 **Also now**

 **Note important**

 **I have changed the story. The memories wash sees is not his own. Remember Epsilon? The AI that committed suicide inside Good ol' David? (agent Washington)**

 **The one that the called church after alpha was wiped out?**

"I almost feel sorry for them." Said Blake as she watched Jaune's sisters beat the crap out of Cardin and his goons.

"But it is fun watching them"

"You are evil"

Jaune's sisters had Cardin and his team on a leash and used them as their personal attendants.

"So ready for the mission?" asked ruby, referring about their hunter shadowing, world saving mission.

 **On the team 3 escape pod**

"Caboose, is that a teleportation grenade?" asked wash

"….."

"The one which glows orange makes everything disappear?"

"….."

Wash face palmed " **Grif colour?** "

"Oh? Why didn't you just say so? Yes?"

"How did you even get it?"

"I asked Santa for a gift and he gave me the present!"

"Please tell me you did not pull the pin!" most everyone tenses up.

"Oh, you mean this?"

Caboose pulls the pin. Of course he does.

Everyone except Lopez, said "SON OF A BITCH"

Lopez "HIJO DE AD" you can probably guess what that means…

There is a bright, orange glow and the pod disappears.

 **Remnant, team rwby, during episode Breach, Ruby**

Even with the backup and atlas military, grim were still coming, when the ground shock and multiple Beringels came out, and started destroying everything. Ruby sees one grab Weiss and throw her at a wall. The dust settles and Weiss is no were to be seen.

"Look out Ruby" shouts Yang

Ruby sees a Beringel raising its hand, about to crush ruby. *Thud*

She gets pushed behind to the ground. When she opens her eyes, she sees a shuttle thing had landed on the Grim, and out of it came various soldiers one in blue, a light blue-ish shade, one green, one grey, one black, and… one pink and a another purple?

But the appearance of these people noticeably changed the balance of the battle. One of the them started shouting, " **Muhahaha… taste oblivion** "

"Caboose, don't hug that" shouted one in Ozpin's voice as the blue one crushed a Beringel to death.

Hostiles detectedfiring main cannon

And with that the blue robot thing started shooting every grim left and right, with sniper accuracy.

The black one was using a shotgun and killing grim, the light blue-ish one spinning and back-flipping with two guns, one in each hand using some blue ammo, and causing a massacre, the pink one was actually throwing grenades further than one of my friend's grenade launcher. Sufficient to say Nora will not be happy. The green one had a pistol and was on some sort of hit and run mode, the grey one was a bit of a bad… you get it?

And the purple one was debating with its self while blowing grim to… Oblivious? Didn't it mean not to know?

" **Muhahaha… die you insurable fools.** "

"O'Malley! That is not very nice."

" **Shut up fool. It is the appropriate amount of nice**."

And then a there was a shot. A loud bang of a sniper near me. An alpha wolf dissolves behind me.

"locus." The grey one says, to… thin air?

"Agent Washington" he replied and Mr Locus appeared

"MR LOCUS" I shout

"Ruby rose?" whispered Washingtub

"You know her?" Mr Locus looked surprised, but they seem to forget that I was here.

"Epsilon knew her… as a friend"

"Epso-who?" I asked, causing the 'I forgot you were look'

A grim appeared behind him but he shot it without even looking at it, through the eye

He looked me in the eye, I think with the helmet and said, with a sight, "Jaune is dead"

 **Sorry fo no badass fighting scenes, thought they will be there. Read the note above. Important. Very, VERY important.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A new chapter. Will try to post the next one by 16** **th** **.**

 **Special thx to** "BraveSeeker3" **for help**

 **I don't own rvb or rwby**

* * *

 **While Wash and team 3 fight in Remnant, Lets see what Sarge is doing**

"I never thought I'd reach the moment in my life when I actually missed Grif, but here it is." Said Sarge after Grif fell off a cliff. (Did not rhyme it on purpose)

"Sarge this has happened to Grif before, and like last time he has the Grifshot. Maybe, statically speaking he may be alive, like the last time" said Simmons, "He might be just dangling over the edge, with the blade stuck in the cliff. I think it is amazing the blade has not broken yet"

"You know, that would be a good shot for a movie" Said Jax

The soldiers face palm, along with Dylan.

"Are they always like this?" asked the pilot

Before Dylan can answer, they here is a cocking of a shot gun.

"Insubordination! Don't worry Simmons, I have GOT A BONNER FOR MURDER"

" **I am still alive!** " Shouted Grif

"Kill me already" whispered the pilot

"Die you blue-tard!"

"Thank you god for letting me die. better than to stay with these idiots-"

"Today is the day another blue man goes to the fiery depths of hell or which ever hole they come from"

"I am not a smurf, old man"

*thud* "ouch" Sarge hits him with a shotgun

"What's your rank, solder?!"

"S-second lieutenant-*thud* ouch"

"Dirt bag, I outrank you"

"We are from DIFFERENT ARMIES! You old hag!"

"Hahaha- knew from the looks of your face, your one of those seaming, dirty blues! Your diabolical scheme to defeat us will never work. NEVER i say!"

He turns to Grif and Simmons pleadingly.

"First, we all wear helmets. Second, for the love of god, KILL ME ALREADY!"

"Simmons, initiate plan- kill the traitor"

"*sight* on it sir"

They start beating up Grif "why?" he asks

"Darn it, why are we hitting Grif" Sarge asked Simmons

"Yeah- wait a second, didn't you fall of a cliff?" asked Simmons

"I was dangling over the edge, with the Grifshot stuck in the cliff. I called for help, and Dylan and the 'real soldiers' pulled me up" *ouch*

"I think it is amazing the blade has not broken yet"

"You already said that, kiss-ass" said grif

"Simons, why didn't operation kill the traitor work? And Grif's ghost is back!"

"Sir, operation kill the traitor is a code name for operation Shoot Grif, and Grif use the Grifshot to hang on the cliff's face"

"Its blade has still not broken?" asked Sarge in surprise

"Simmons already made that joke" Said Grif

*thud* "Ouch"

"Simmons already made that joke, _Sir_ " Said Grif

"Simon, commence operation Shoot Grif"

"Sir, we have talked about this. Operation Shoot Grif is exactly what it sounds like, and operation shoot Doc and operation kill the stranger are code-names for operation shoot Grif"

*Bang* "W-why?"

"*sight* Dang it, the blue outsmarted us" he turns to the pilot

"You win this time, you dirty blue. Red team, retreat for staff meeting." grumbles Sarge

The pilot turns to the others. "Can someone explain me what the fuck just happened?"

"Wash and Carolina didn't have to face this shit" grumbled Simmons in the background

"They could. They have Caboose and Donut"

"And Doc" added Jax.

"Yeah, your right. I wonder what they might be doing right now. wait, why are you following us?"

"I am going to add this in my movie"

* * *

 **Remnant, team rwby, after match of episode Breach**

"H-he's dead?" she squeaked

The grey one sighted. "When he came to our world, he was fun, loving, childish. but war changed-" Locus touched him

"You know she can't understand what the heck you are talking about, right" he said, the voice box he always had made him sound like death personified.

"*sight* Where is Professor Ozpin?" he asked Locus and Ruby, and when they said they did not know, he sighted and started looking around (wow, *sight*seeing. I know jokes are supposed to be funny. shut up)

" **WHAT! NO BLOOD AND GOO! BUT THERE WAS SO MUCH CARNAGE!** " shouted O'Malley

"O'Malley, behave. You did get to do what you wanted, right?" Said doc

" **Shut up you fool. what is the fun if there is no blood** "

"well, no blood mean..."

" **Oblivion!** "

"see, everything is fun when we things together!"

" **Just shut up!** "

"Where have the fluffy bears gone?" shouted a blue colored walking tank in the background

"How?" asked Ruby as she followed

"You might wana call your friends and sit down. This is a long story, about 15 seasons. And I like to tell it with 5 minute breaks"

"5 what?"

"Err- never mind"

"err is not a word" said caboose

"It is. Now shut up. She was church's friend" caboose turns to ruby

"Oh. You are his friend? Me to. Just different. I was his best friend"

Wash turns to Ruby, who was in a shock, trying to process the fact that Jaune was dead… and who was this Church

"Get your friend and Ozpin, and check on Weiss" said Locus, his voice bringing Ruby back to her senses. she ran towards her friends.

 **End of chapter 3**

 **And here ends another chapter. If any of you have a suggestion, plz leave a message. I need some help with the story. Read on for spoiler**

* * *

 _ **SPOILER ALERT**_

* * *

 _From a distance, a certain white colored soldier was watching. He grunted and a blue hologram appeared next to him. "Wash, Donuts, Doc and Caboose and some UNSC people. But who is the Cyan chick? looks like a freelance"_

 _The white one just grunted_

" _Agent Carolina?, from project freelancer?"_

 _The white soldier took of his eva helmet, sadly remembering all he did under sigma's control. How sigma made a copy of himself inside his head, and made him betray wash. How the time distortion unit created a copy of him which died. How he came here. For redemption._

" _Don't worry, sigma is gone now" said the blue hologram, referring to the fact that he had absorbed Sigma, Gamma and O'Malley_

 _A green one took his place "But we need to meet Carolina. I need to give her York's final words"_

 _"Delta you know about Carolina? tell me about her"_

 _A single tear fell. The looked behind and saw grim converging near him, because of his sadness._

" _You know, you should keep your eyes closed theta" said Delta to the red/blue one_

" _I almost feel sorry for them" said the blue one_

" _Then don't" said the black one_

 _The white one took out a type-25 grenade launcher. And the grim started backing down in fear._

 ** _Thx for my Supporters_**

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And a random guest user who's name i really don't know


	4. Chapter 4

**Another chapter.**

 **Special thx to** "BraveSeeker3" **for help in content and jokes to add**

 **Inspiration- Battle Scars by Lupe Fiasco and Guy Sebastian**

 **I don't own rwby or rvb or the song battle scars**

* * *

And Caboose tells them there story, while wash and Carolina face palm

Then Donut tells them the story. Double-o-Donut face palm

* * *

 **This I copied from freelancer arc. This joke is too good to not use. Sue me if u want. look at it bellow**

* * *

Donut the musical. Wash has to hold Carolina back.

At last, Doc and Wash tell them the actual story.

A few awaked moment while the group, the pilot and the odst process what the heck had been said to them.

"So, Jaune is dead?" Pyrrha asked wash suddenly, and unflinchingly. Truth be told, wash really didn't want a bad-ass, Carolina copy to be his enemy, but she was really creeping him out. He **really** wanted to run away from her. Ozpin and the others were listening quietly.

"You loved him, didn't you?" Ruby looks surprised, but no one else. But Pyrrha does not respond. Eerie silence.

"War with love, those wounds never heal" he continued, slowly. Pyrrha looked unharmed, but her eyes were turning bloodshot. And wash knew. He still remembered York eyes… err-eye. (Err is a word. Sorry tucker, but Simmons was right.)

"h-how c-can you know" she was now shriving. "Y-you know nothing of loss. I-i lost the person who I love without him even k-knowing about it

Instinctively, for some reason, Caboose hugged her, and Pyrrha started crying.

Wash kept his mouth close, but I his mind…

"I do" said Caboose, just what wash was thinking, but not in his usual tone, as it was much more mature, clearer, and normal. It. Was. Fucking. Wrong.

Wash looked at Carolina, in confusion, who tilts her head, like _WTF_

"Her name was Sheila" Back to classic Caboose.

"Ok… who is Sheila?" asked Carolina, really, Really, REALLY confused.

"A tank Caboose fell in love with" replied wash.

"…"

"…"

"…"

"What?"

"Why does this not surprise me?"

"Yeah, she was nice, and not mean tank-lady" Answered Caboose.

Pyrrha was peacefully sleeping on one of Ozpin's room's chairs.

"Ok, Caboose, how did you…?" asked wash, pointing to Pyrrha, smiling in her sleep

"I have my ways" he answered in a dark tone, and then whispered "Twinkle-twinkle little star" in his normal voice.

Ozpin, Carolina, wash, and team RWBY, Ren and Nora start talking, and ignore Caboose. _Day r smrt!_

"See Lopez, and that's how a real tea party should be planed" said one of their light-ish red friend to Lopez

" _Gracias a mi dios inexistente que puedo cerrar los oídos"_ replied Lopez, "Por desgracia no puedo hacer lo mismo a mis oídos"

(Thanks to my nonexistent god that I can shut my ears, sadly i can't do the same to my ears)

He looks at Donut

" _Matame ya"_ he says hopefully.

(Kill me)

" **SO MUCH OBLIVION!** " shouted O'Malley

"Keep quiet, sir" said the ODST, Miller

"Ok, principle miller" said Caboose, "I will go away now" even though it was not directed at him. He went to the elevator and said. "Oh… buttons. Beep-bop-beep"

"SOMBODY STOP CABOOSE!" shouted Carolina, Wash, and Lopez, the latter in Spanish in slow motion.

But he was already gone. _Sea, so smrt_

"Why are you all so scared, he only went to wander in the school?"

* * *

 _ **Flashback**_

" _Freckles, a pet giant mech, a killing machine capable of destroying us all" said wash_

" _The dinosaurs he tamed" Said Carolina_

" _Killing Church with the tank"_

" _Accidently going to reach as Noble Six, killing hoards of covenant, and surviving"_

" _Trigging the alarm at the desert"_

" _Sir rounds-a-lot, an alien vessel with a laser face"_

" _Wandering into Locus and the Mercs to name a few" Concluded wash_

* * *

 _ **End of flash back**_

"I don't really know how to respond to that" said Ozpin. Glynda was stiff in surprise. Wash was practically punching the lift's call button

"If you could, you would not be human" said Wash

"Better than when all they did was stand around and talk" said Doc

"Your voice?" asked Ozpin

"Later, first let's find Caboose" said wash

They step inside

"…do I really wana know" asked wash, pointing at fort port, remembering professor port

"…no I don't think you would. It would scar you for life" replied Ozpin

"Let's act a little mature" said Glynda. It took a lot of time to get used to the fact that Glynda and a lot of others sounded like people they already know. And that they were younger

 **The teleportation thingy had made them all younger. And caboose had gotten his pinkey back. Caboose remembered losing it, but could not explain why church shot him, but doc did. And how he actually hit him, even Doc could not understand**

In fact, it turns out a lot of people there sound a lot like the people they know back home, and Pyrrha also looked like Carolina.

"Wow, that was a lot of pounding and my hands are still sticky" the group undertook the plasma grenades that stuck to enemies, and the fight, rest including Miller and, not counting Ruby were shell-shocked

"Plasma grenades, they are a type of sticky grenades, and he has no idea what he is saying" Said wash quickly

The ground shakes, and a voice shouts "Tucker did it" in there radio. a trail of smoke con be seen from Ozpin's office

"That was him, isn't it" asks Ozpin

"Yes" answers Wash

 _Moral of the story, never ignore Caboose_

 **Inside one of the school dorms, half an hour ago**

* * *

"Who are these new people?" asked Cinder to herself. She then turns to Neo, Emerald and Mercury. "Find all you can about these people"

 **A warehouse where the white fang were trying to explain to Caboose that they had kidnapped him, and were trying to tie him with metal chains, while he kept breaking them and petting the faunus, minutes before the explosion.**

* * *

"Stay there"

"Ok"

"Don't move"

"Is this a… ki…" the wolf faunus trying to tie caboose looks up, thinking that he understood that this is a kidnap "Kind of game?"

"Man... this in unprofessional. Please, _ **help me**_ out"

* * *

" **Five minutes later" in SpongeBob narrator voice**

"Tucker did it" said Caboose, freckles in hand

 _Nice work sir_

"I did not do anything. It was no one's fault. Everyone agrees. I think the wolf man did it" he said the last part in almost a whisper.

* * *

 _ **A nother chapter over. If u guys have any ideas, comment or pm me. If any questions, ask me. Thx for my supporters. My second biggest chapter yet, in content wise.**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry I was gone. Exams.**

 **So now I have watched the first 7 episodes of RWBY season 5, I know a whole deal more, like the content etc.**

 _ **Special thx to**_ _"BraveSeeker3"_

 _Chapter re-mastered, as it had become too complicated._

* * *

 **The gang reach the explosion site, a white fang warehouse apparently, to see a raging inferno, and Caboose coming out of it, followed by a 2 story tall behemoth**

"In all my life" thought the great wizard Ozpin, "even creating the maidens or explaining my existence to new host when i reincarnate or such, I could have never have been prepared for this' as he looked at Caboose talking to a bloody skull and a giant robot trailing him. Yep, pieces of blood and brain and goo were all over it. Weiss ran away at the sight, followed by the Pilot, Pyrrha, Ren, who was dragging Nora, and Blake.

"Caboose. Don't tell me why, at least tell me how!" deadpanned Wash.

"Okay, yeah-okay –oh… yep... Yeah Wash this is Jimmy- my friend. Say hello?"

Jimmy stays quite.

"What. The. Actual. Fuck." asked Wash as he stared. Carolina was face-palming

"This. Is. Jimmy. "

"What?" asked Yang as she held her little sis's eyes closed.

"Why is Jimmy a skull?" asked Wash. Carolina was face-slamming

"Everyone has a Skull Andy was once a skull!" replied Caboose

"Yeah, but inside them!"

"I love having things inside me!" Squeaked Donut

Glynda looked ready to beat him shit-less, only to be stopped by Ozpin. Carolina took a round turn and went to take some fresh air. Yang lost her balance, and almost fell on Ruby.

"Those cute little black doggies have them- OH MY GOSH! There inside-OUT! They will make good friends with Church! He also turns inside out from time to time. Not my fault. I didn't kill him"

"Who?" asked Yang.

Ironwood looked at Wash

"How are you still sane?"

"Truth be told, I have no fucking idea"

Doc came there sprinting

"Oh hey guys- why is there a skull in Caboose's hand?"

" **Muhahaha... So much carnage and blood!"**

"O'Malley behave!"

" **Shut up you buffoon!"**

"CAN EVERYONE JUST CALM DOWN FOR TWO SECONDS BEFORE SOMETHING IMPOSSIBLE HAPPENS!" Shouted Yang

One

Two

Ring-ring

A muffin falls on her head. Everyone looks at her.

"Okay… what?" asked Millers

"Was that... a muffin?" Asked Carolina

"Captain MacMuffin?" Asked Caboose

"Muffin?" asked Ruby, trying to pry Yang's hands

"And Freckles... Is… A REAL BOY AGAIN!" shouted you-know-who

 _AFFIRMATIVE CAPTAIN CABOOSE_

"You know, now I miss the times when all we used to do was stand around and talk" Commented Tucker

"Yeah, the good' old days" said Donut, "we all had each other's behinds"

(Yes, it was ignored)

"I know, so much violence is against my beliefs" said Doc

"How did you create a mech, get a bloodied skull, kill white fang terrorist and destroy their warehouse! You had been gone for like... 7 minutes?" Ironwood deadpanned

"Better if you don't think about it, don't waste your sanity" Said Carolina

Caboose started scratching the Freckles 'paw'.

"Who's a good boy? Who's a real boy?" he asked Freckle

 _I AM_ replied Freckles, enjoying himself.

"Eek… WOW-SO-COOL-QUADMISSILE-LAUNCHER-AND-GATTLING-GUN! AND-ENERGY-SHIELDS!" Shouted a certain Grimm reaper

"Well Caboose, let's take you back to school…" said Ozpin. All of them start to follow Ozpin.

"Are we there yet?

"I have to go to the washroom. Not Wash's room. Nope. The bathroom washroom

"I am thirsty

"Are we there yet?

"Where are we?

"I am hungry"

"Are we there yet?"

All for one and one for all

"SHUT UP!"

"…"

"…"

"Are we there yet?"

* * *

 **Let's see what the rest of the reds are up to**

"What happened to him?" asked Dylan, looking at Jax, who lied on the ground, still and lifeless, like Donut when Wash shot him. (Which means almost dead)

Simmons and Grif turn to look at each other for a second

Together- "He slipped and fell"

* * *

 **Cut to Chorus**

"WHAT!" shouted Kimball at the soldiers who has just informed her that the ship that had been carrying the reds and the blues had been found drifting randomly, playing a song "'you're my best friend' by Caboose" on every available radio frequency.

Yes, Caboose's attempt to find Church had caused a slight malfunction in the deep space vessel's sensors, making it think it had a black hole inside its core engine.

Only Smith's escape pod's signal had located which was ironically on its way to the local black-hole.

* * *

 **Ozpin offers Wash and the gang an offer to join beacon**

"So I will give you a day-"

"We accept" Said Wash.

"We do?" Asked Tucker

"¿No es él tu líder?" Asked Lopez (isn't he your leader?)

Carolina elbowed Tucker while Donut spoke "I agree, pencils ARE great"

"So, it is set, from tomorrow, all of you will attend beacon, even you friend Lopez"

* * *

 **From a few blocks away, a sniper was targeting Carolina, her being the leader of the rvb there. As the sniper got the go sign from Cinder, he pointed the cross-hair at Carolina and…**

Unbearable pain erupted from his chest as he was raised above the ground. Looking down, he saw a blade coming out of his chest, and his legs twitching violently, suggesting his spine had been broken.

The last thing he saw was a golden helmet.

Meta dropped the limp body, while Church sighted.

"You just HAD to kill him brutally, asshole. Now how the fuck do I calm Theta down!"

Meta grunted

"Fuck you too" replied Church, then observed the skull in Caboose's hand

"Wait... That's Jimmy's Skull! Tex had beaten him to death with it!"

"That... Doesn't seem physical possible" Thought Meta

"Church, Caboose is straying from the group" Delta suddenly appeared

Church paused

"What the fuck is wrong with those people! THEY'RE LETTING CABOOSE ROAM AROUND…. AGAIN!"

O'Malley appeared

"Are you feeling angry alpha….?"

"No, I'm fine"

Meta grunted again

"Even I have missed things like this, so it is normal for them to miss things-" _Hiss_ "Yes, even a 10-ton giant all-killing robot"

Meta just tilted his head. (CONFUSED)

"Yes, I know. There is a reason why they were simulation troops"

Meta hissed

"Yes, even if a dragon suddenly appeared with Caboose riding on it, most of them would not notice, just like Donut failed to notice you were trying to kill him the first time you met him"

Eerie silence.

"Church, may I suggest now is a good time to help Theta" Delta barged in.

"Sorry" said Church.

Delta turned towards the Meta.

"Time for baby-sitting" He said, struggling to predict Caboose's possible path. Man, that guy was random. After a few seconds (for a human) he settled to using a grid map of the city and looking for Freckles and Caboose through the traffic cam.

* * *

 **Delta looks at the camera recordings, sharing it to Church**

 _"De-de-de, were is the bathroom, de-de-de, I need a bathroom" sang Caboose as Freckles commented 'OPERATION- piggyback ride', causing a massive panic to the public_

* * *

 _ **Cut to Church trying to Cheer up Theta**_

"We need bigger cookies" Joked Church as he looked at recording, making Theta look up… and scream about how much he wanted to pet the cute puppy (Freckles)

* * *

 **Back to our** **favorite** **,** 'smart' **heroes**

Locus spotted the white figure of Meta with bloodied fists, and then turned away.

As the group talked to each-other, Doc was left alone, ignored. Suddenly he noticed something important.

"Ahh… guy? Where is Caboose?" asked Doc

Eerie silence. Yes, i love that word.

" **YOU BAFFOONS!"** Screamed O'Malley

* * *

 **And I'm very sorry for the format. Simplified it a lot, if still any of you think it is too complicated, will work on it again, or create a new chapter**. **Just tell me.**


	6. Chapter 6 Return of the 'Prodigal Son'

**Special thx to** _BraveSeeker3_

* * *

"Help me… please, oh go the horrors!" shouted the pilot, Blade as he was tied to a chair and being "interrogated" by Sarge. Which meant Sarge making a fool out of himself again and again.

At the beginning of this torture, Sarge started with regular shit. The blue enemy red allies. Then the crazy-old-hag-ness, with the conspiracy.

At this point Simmons was getting annoyed, while Grif provoked Sarge even more.

Then deep shit about stabbing people in the back and looting the body. (Simmons had dibs on all his electronic gadgets, while Grif on his porn collection and food)

And to top it all, bullshit. ACTUAL and REAL bullshit. Turns out Sarge had a torture bag in which he kept stuff… (I don't think the things in that bag qualify as stuff, more like Tools of death! Ah, the horrors. Like photos of old people having sex, and Donut's nude-selfies…)

Simmons walked away.

At last, when Blade outsmarted Sarge by telling him the Command override code (You all can probably guess it), Grif told Sarge to narrate 'was stories' to Blade, while Simmons slept under a tree

They were actually pretty good, until Sarge decided he wanted to show scars to prove them. And to Blade's plight of seeing more disgusting and wrinkly skin, some scars were on less than decent places… Brr- let's just keep it at that much.

Lt Rook tapped Sarge on his shoulder as Blade cried.

"Sir, i think that man has learned his lesson for supporting the dirty blues dirt bags"

"Your right, look how he is crying at being miss-guided for so long. I have now opened his eyes and he won't have to go to the hell hole where all those dirty dead blues go"

"*Sight* yes sir" _poor Blade_ he thought, _why couldn't he just act like he was the member of the red army?_

"I'm now go and complete my warthog" Said Sarge "Gravity can't fight itself, can it now son?"

 _Poor old sterile fool_ thought Rook, _trying to create a warthog with parts from the escape pod and Grif's microwave!_

* * *

 **Time jump- 30 minutes lator**

" _Hola amigos"_ (Hello friends) Said a brown robot

"Ladies, meat Lopez Tres.0, who will create our car" Said Sarge

"Did he just create an android with smart AI features, just to create a car?" Asked Blade in disbelief.

"Turns out I can't synthesis head light fluid, so we needed someone smarter than me"

"I'm here" deadpanned Simmons

"Don't be ridiculous, Son"

"Okay sir, can you call me son again, please sir?"

"He created the original one just to change the batteries of our radio" Explained Grif

" _Hola"_ replies Lt Rook (hello)

" _Soy Lopez Dos.0"_ (I am Lopez Tres.0)

" _Soy el teniente Rook"_ (I am Lt Rook)

"You speak Spanish to?!" Said Grif

"Sarge, why do all your creations speak Spanish?!" asked Simmons

"Why yes Simmons, I have to make sure the enemy isn't able to get any information out of Lopez in case he is captured" Replied Sarge

"…"

"I know, I'm a genius"

"…"

"All you mortals can get enlightened by my holy greatness"

"This is goanna be great for my movie" Squeaked Jax

*Bang* Capt. Rogers, who had been in the side-lines the entire time shot himself in the head

"¿"

"Yea, a suicide scene! Though a little bit more brain goo should make it seem more realistic!" Said the over ambitious wanna-be movie director.

"...Jax?- just don't" sighted Dylan

* * *

 **Sorry for the small chapter, but having tests every day! also smaller chapters means the story is less confusing**


	7. Chapter 7 important message

I have taken this chapter down for editing as fanfric doesn't support bigger to and smaller to signs


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